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“Rednecks. They don’t just shoot to kill. They shoot to empty the gun.”
— Dr. Richard Hanes, from Dr. Eve, Zombie Killer

“Why’d you shoot him fourteen times, Earl?” Taggert asked “Dat’s all duh bullets I’z had.”
— Taggert and Earl

“I don't rent guns. I own them.”
— Dr. Eve
“Now, I’ve had a hard day. I’m hungry, tired, and my feet hurt, and I’m in a really bad mood! So don’t patronize me. Either help me or get out of my way!”
— Rachel, from GEIST

Everyone needs mental down time at some point in order to maintain their sanity… — Rachel

“You cry. Then you rest. Then you go on vith the rest of your life. That is vhat you do.” — Ada's advice, from GEIST
"Lots of people get on TV. Not that many are worth remembering."
— Dr. Eve

She was attractive in the plastic sort of way that a Barbie is attractive. A surgeon had given her what God did not.
— from Dr. Eve, Zombie Killer

"I must've drank like a red-neck sucks down beer at a barbecue."
— Dr. Hanes
“Oh, you again. You love my meat. You always come again.”
— Salvo, from Dr. Eve, Zombie Killer

“I don't rent guns. I own them.”
— Dr. Eve

“Political zombies, you know, people who do what they’re told because money or the promise of influence has corrupted them.”
— Derek, from Dr. Eve, Zombie Killer
"Oh, I can tell you one thing, buddy, if you hadn't been at the birth of OUR first child, there wouldn't have been a second one!"
— Maria, from My Sister's Husband

"You must always keep tabs on your man, even when he's at home."
— Susanne

A man that won't look you in the eye; that raises a red flag in my book. Personally and professionally."
— Maria
“What a looker! A woman who looks like that needs some protection, if you know what I mean. She's so tiny and sweet, just like spun sugar.”
— Cowboy, from Dr. Eve, Zombie Killer

Oh great. Another big dumb know-it-all chauvanistic, gun-totin', self-proclaimed expert-shootin' cowboy. If I stay, he's probably just going to bug me about how great he is. Is it worth it? Do I really want to practice that bad?— Dr. Eve
"Men are accessories, not necessities."
— Alicia, from My Sister's Husband

“Let’s face it. She got the brains and the looks; all I got was big boobs and a sunny disposition, which soured with age and experience.”
— Maria

"Where was my vain, perfectly shallow, corporate-ladder-climbing big sister?"
— Maria
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